Architect as …
In the course of events over the past 8 years, I’ve let this website grow old, dusty and fallow. That’s something I’m not proud of, but it happened.
I’m currently in a period of personal introspection and growth. As such, I’m revisiting this website and everything in it. All my old posts and pages are preserved and archived for the time being. Some may come back, others will stay in cold storage.
Here’s to a new selophane.com, whatever that may be.
I know that in some cases when most blogs go inactive the authors are out leading incredibly exciting lives and are just too busy to write. Or sometimes the authors are going through a major change of life: moving, getting married, having kids, etc. Maybe the authors have been horribly injured and are stuck in a coma and can’t open their eyes let alone compose a post and source images.
None of these things happened. Here’s what happened:
I ran out of things to say.
It wasn’t that i said everything i had to say, not in the least, its just that I got to a point where i felt that every post needed to be a well crafter article with references and deep thoughts. I forgot that the soul of blogging is that its a conversation, I write and you respond. So I moved to twitter for a bit and posted on there my random thoughts, but eventually that became too much to keep up with. I felt that if i wasn’t actively engaged all of the time I was just a broadcaster and not a part of the conversation, so I stopped using that too, and then both went silent.
Of course, I’ve also been focusing on a bunch of things going on in my life – I started a job in DC a year ago (which I can’t write much about). Before this I had been unemployed for 9 months, during which time I took my licensing exams and passed, making em a licensed architect in Virginia and DC (after filing for reciprocity). The combination of stepping out of the day to day practice of architecture and the end of my internship period coupled with starting my own firm lead to a little bit of blogging withdrawal. I stopped reading local blogs and stopped finding things to have opinions about. Then, this summer I moved into an apartment in DC during the week and continue to live in the burbs on the weekends, this makes my commute manageable instead of a 1.5 hour each way nightmare. My apartment is a shared 2 bedroom + office in Southwest DC, where I have the 7×7 office which is a study in minimal living. Its just large enough for a twin bed, a table a dresser and a chair. I use a folding rice paper screen as a door, which while effective doesn’t really provide privacy. In addition, one of my roommates is my business partner for my architecture firm, studioSML, llc, so I’ve actually gotten a lot more involved in working on that. And lastly, and a future post topic, my sister got married and I designed and built a chuppah (jewish wedding canopy) for her out of Copper plumbing, canvas, and decorative cording.
So, I guess I did get busy, a bit. But I’m back, why? Because I’ve started feeling the need to talk about architectural things again. I won’t make any promises on the regularity of posts, nor the depth and breadth of their examinations. But I’m glad to have refound a reason to blog. 1
Over the next few weeks I’m going to be posting some posts that have been sitting in my drafts folder for way too long.
After that I hope to bring this blog active again.
Today I turned another year older, and I think a little retrospective is in order. In the course of a year its sometimes hard to see the little things and I sometimes have a habit of overlooking all that I’ve accomplished. After sitting down with my employer yesterday for a yearly review I decided that maybe I should do the same for my life outside of my day job, so as a little experiment I figured I would list all of my quantifiable achievements and deficiencies over the past year. I:
So one of my rules about writing for this blog is that I don’t write about details within my personal life. Well, to explain why I haven’t posted I need to break this cardinal rule.
My world has been in a bit of flat spin these past few days. To understand why I need to back track a bit. As many of you know, in February I was laid off of work. Since that time I have taken my licensing exams and started my own (not yet profitable) firm, all while making due on unemployment. Because my finances were drastically reduced I applied with my Mortgage Servicer, Bank of America, for hardship assistance back in March. After one case of lost paperwork and a second submission i finally was told in May that I was ineligible for a loan modification because my loan is privately held. I thought that would be the end of my situation, i wouldn’t be able to adjust my mortgage but I would find some way to make ends meet. A few weeks later I received a call from the bank telling us that if while we couldn’t be serviced with the original plan, if we entered a 3 month forebearance which would effictively make us 2 months behind on our payments, we would be eligible and likely candidates for a modification through the other option of the Making Home Affordable program. Part of this agreement was that we would not have any late fees nor any negative impact on our credit scores, and any arrears would be rolled into the modified mortgage. By the start of Junes we had signed the paperwork and started down the primrose path under the assumption that they still had all of our paperwork and that in three months we would find out about our modification. Three months later our forbearance expired and after a few weeks of non-communication and being told to wait for contact from the analyst we were told that we needed to resubmit our paperwork and data. We were told that once they received our paperwork within 4 weeks we would receive a fedex package with our loan modification documents.
Here is where a detour occurs in the story. About 2 weeks after our contact with the bank I came down with a weird mystery illness. I started having daily cyclical fevers, lack of appetite and intense malaise. After a week and a half of trying to let it run its course I went to the Doctor. After another week and a half of waiting for my blood work results they came back showing that I had mono and possibly Lyme Disease, which was at least better than their initial suspicions of Lupus. Not 3 days after finding out why I was so tired and weirdly sick we got a call (not paperwork as promised) from the bank. They called to tell us that our modification was denied, because as a person who was unemployed my contribution to the household income was not enough in relation to our debts. I had two options, I could increase my income (I would gladly do that if it was possible) or decrease my debts (which again is not possible given my situation). The call was escalated to the call center Manager and I was told by him that I as someone who was unemployed I should never have been told that I could qualify under the Making Home Affordable plan (even though their website’s eligibility calculator suggests that it is intended for those with a decreased income due to job loss). In addition, we were also informed that we needed to pay the amount due on the account within 8 days (5 business days) otherwise they would start reporting us as delinquent to the credit agencies and start foreclosure proceedings, even though we still have not received anything in writing stating that our request has been denied.
At this point I had had it, so I insisted on speaking to his manager and was given a voicemail. I calmly but forcefully expressed my frustration and displeasure at their practices, suggested that their customer service was reprehensible, and insisted that if this was not resolved I would seek legal counsel and ask my friends and associates to change banks. This was on Friday, as of tonight I have not heard back from the supposed manager. Meanwhile, I have contacted HUD to get some assistance and clarification on this program and started the process of short selling my house so I don’t have to go to foreclosure.
As you can see, I’ve been a bit distracted and have not had a spare moment to focus on this blog. I apologize. I have a few posts that have been percolating and will be posting them in the coming days/week. I appreciate your patience.
So, in addition to putting together our first permit set this week and having our first paint color consultation with a client, I have been feeling really sick. This is why I haven’t updated the last two days. I’ve been exhausted and had no appetite (yay! Weight loss!) and been having a series of fevers that give me a much better understanding of what women go through during menopause. At first I thought this was all allergy related, but after my first visit to an allergist yesterday (I’m allergic to dust mites, cats and all plant life here in northern Virginia) she seemed to think that it was something better suited to an internist to look into. So I’ve spent the morning being poked, stuck and x-rayed so they can try to figure out what is wrong with me.
I can’t help but think that a week ago I found out that I am an Architect, which at the time seemed like such a weighty matter and that it changed the course of my life. While now it seems like a small bump in the road compared to my physical well being. I just have to hope that they find it’s nothing major and something completely curable.
There will be no update today, I am busy working on a deadline.
There will be no post today.
I am observing Yom Kippur in my own way; fasting and contemplating my year past and the one to come. I am going to focus on what about myself I need to work on and how I can be both a better person and a better me.
Tonight I saw Julie and Julia, which after my bout of malaise this week was the perfect impetus I needed. I heartily identified with the character of Jules, I too am in my late 20’s and also feel like I never finish anything I start.
Unlike the main character of this movie, I am not blogging to a deadline or a goal, so instead for me to be successful in jumpstarting this blog, and the two columns I should be writing weekly, I need to set a new series of deadlines and commitments.
Starting Monday I will be posting something 5 days a week and these posts need to be up before noon. This should accomplish two things. One, it will get me up earlier, because I will need time to find something to post about and also be able to write coherently about it will require me to have a few hours of waking time before I post it. Second, this will also get me in a regular routine, which should combat the malaise I’ve been fighting.
I am hopeful that getting myself into a real schedule again will be beneficial for not only this blog and my business, studioSML, but also my health.
Lately I’ve discovered that the greatest enemy of the unemployed architect is not a bad economy, but malaise.
Over the past 6 months I’ve managed to pull together some work to get my new firm off the ground, but not enough to make a profit yet (what with the cost of startup expenses). I would love to say that these jobs have come my way through genius marketing and relentless pursuit of new clients, but it has been more a combination of networking and chance. But hey, I’ll take work any way I can get it right now.
Couple this stream of work that doesn’t feed me with my ineffable ability to bite off more than i can chew (I am now officially writing for two different blogs, also unpaid) and you can start to understand why I see the ugly specter of malaise around every corner. It is not that I am lazy, jut not motivated. When faced with the option of overcoming inertia and starting work on a project or giving into Newton’s first law of motion I am more likely to choose the latter out of sheer lack of motivation.
Obviously, I need to find a way to motivate myself and I have already completed the first step, identifying the problem. The problem is one of routine. While I was employed I got into a routine of working during the day on my employers work and at night on my own projects. Now that I don’t have that routine and my day can follow any pattern I choose I am much less likely to achieve my goals. What this means is that I need to start creating my own schedule and routine. If I can, I will be successful, and this blog will start being updated regularly again.